All love

Last night I held Max. He had fallen asleep nursing and the grip he had on my necklace slowly went limp. His little bottom lip folded in the middle, as babies' lips do, because his cheek was pressed to my arm.  His sweet snore reminded me of what really matters. As he wistfully dreamed, I stopped thinking about my to do list a couple pages long and all the disorganized drawers and cabinets in the house. I stayed in the moment with him and cherished his chubby arms and legs. My lips just rested on his forehead soaking up everything that he is and everything he means. I wanted to share with him right then how much the word 'love' seems to fall short. I wanted to take a picture of his perfection but really there is no camera that can photograph a pure heart and the sweet sound of a baby breathing. I knew I would look at the picture and say, "That's not quite right" because only the snapshots in my heart can capture all the dimensions just how they were.

This post is for Max. This poem is for Max. You're welcome to read it though. It's ok if you laugh at the elementary rhyme scheme or if you cry because you miss your babies. It's ok if you roll your eyes at the extreeeeme cheesiness or if you hold your little ones and think the exact same things. Mostly, I just wanted to record the things that just came out of my mouth as I rocked my first child and admired God's handiwork and divine plan. I thank Him for giving me what I didn't know that I needed.

My darling. My dear.

I will always be near

when you have a tear; when you're full of fear

when you learn to crawl; when you shoot the ball

when you laugh and play; when you lose your way

when we read a book in our favorite nook

when your eyes are heavy and you need your teddy

when the homework's tough; when the kids are rough

when you make some friends; when the movie ends

when the sun is shining; even when you're whining

when you cough and sneeze; when you take the keys

when you kneel and pray; when you move away.

My darling. My dear.

Just so I am clear...

when you're in our house; when you have a spouse

this my heart ensures - my love will always be yours.

Love, Mom